When a pregnancy ends in stillbirth or miscarriage, children may have to deal with deep emotions. Like the parents, their existing children will also have suffered a loss. While you might be reeling with very painful feelings, it is critical to give your youngster permission to grieve, and to provide understanding and loving support.
Parenting specialists encourage parents to involve their kids in getting ready for a new child’s arrival. Assuming you’ve followed these suggestions, your youngster has already felt an emotional bond to the pregnancy. The loss of a baby is bound to bring distressful feelings, as well as curiosity.
Here’s your best policy: attempt to get your kids to open up in regard to their feelings as truthfully as possible.
It is important that you provide your youngster an honest account of what happened to the brother or sister they had been expecting. While you don’t need to provide the details, being honest can help keep things simple. Where possible, it is recommended to state the truth and avoid euphemisms for the death that can confuse kids.
Kids are literal. Generally speaking, it is healthy to give them bad news forthrightly. This means telling your children that the pregnancy ended, and that while he or she is no longer with you like before, you will all always remember and feel love for him or her.
Direct explanations are helpful in getting your youngster to assimilate the sad truth, the initial step in the process of grieving. Tell your child that it is normal to feel sad.
Offer your youngster a listening ear for all questions he or she might want to ask. The younger a child is, the more likely it will be that there will be questions asked several times. Each time, repeat the responses, and over time you will see a deepening of comprehension.
It may be very painful to address the same subject repeatedly, but it’s important to do so for your youngster. Your openness, patience, and honesty are essential to his or her ability to cope with the challenging idea of this loss.
The grieving process sometimes is so deep that you feel your child requires more help than you’re able to provide. This type of help might come from additional family members, social workers, close friends, mental health care specialists, or teachers.
If you think that you need support, don’t hesitate to get in touch. There is no need to go through this alone.